The lead up to Christmas, the end of the school year and all the extra social, not to mention financial, pressures at this time of the year create a powerful cocktail for short fuses and increased tension in families. How can we not only survive but even enjoy this time?

After a long hot summer the idea of returning to school, with its routines and work pressures, is challenging enough at the best of times. Add in Covid-19 and the return this year will be met by some children, and teachers, with a mix of fear and trepidation. So how can we help make this transition go as smoothly and with as little stress as possible? Is it even possible in the current climate? The simple answer is, yes, there are things we can do to ease the transition into the start of another school year. These are - preparation, positivity and pacing.

Nobody likes feeling anxious. There’s a clenching in our gut, a tightening of our chest. Often we can feel our heart beating hard and we start breathing faster. Our muscles become tight and uncomfortable. Some people get headaches, others get a sore jaw as they automatically brace for some kind of danger.

Boosting self-confidence

1.      Build in achievable tasks

2.      Break things down into manageable chunks

3.      Take time out

Children have a natural ability to enjoy the moment. They squeal with joy when they feel the softness of a kitten’s fur, they marvel at the bugs they find under a rock and they sigh with pleasure at the smell of baking. The wind in their hair makes them feel alive and the warmth of the sun on their face comforts them.

The arrival of the Delta variant of Covid-19 in the New Zealand community is requiring us all to adjust to a new reality. This is especially the case for young people who are far more at risk from this new form of the virus.

Being able to calm themselves when frightened, angry or sad is possibly the most important stress management skill children can develop. I call this ‘flood management’ as emotions flood the brain and stop children (and us) being able to think clearly. Below are some ways you can prevent frequent ‘floods’ and some thing you can do when you find yourself knee deep in your own or your child’s emotional deluge. All the ideas are aimed at helping children but can also be applied to adults.

Clarity of communication, a willingness to work together with the other person/s, and the willingness to seek a solution are required for successful conflict resolution. As we all know this is well and good when we’re feeling calm and in control but it becomes a great deal more tricky when we feel wronged or put upon.

Knowing why kids do the things they do.

The meaning behind how children behave can be a puzzle. Decoding what they’re really telling us helps children feel listened to and adults feel more capable as parents, teachers or caregivers.

Children differ greatly in their capacity to wait. Some children are just naturally more patient than others. There are some things, however, that you can do to help your child learn how to manage waiting better including helping them with the anger and uncertainty that having to wait engenders, and building their self-control.