When to Refer Your Child, Teen or Self for Therapy
Key points
Therapy is useful if someone is stuck in unhelpful patterns
Indicators for therapy are different for different ages
Early intervention can prevent things getting worse
How do you know when your child’s, teen’s or your own struggles are beyond what you can manage alone? When does natural nervousness or uncertainty become anxiety, when does becoming easily overwhelmed become emotional dysregulation, when does feeling sad become depression, and what is the difference between anger and rage?
Essentially, therapy is useful when a person, of any age, becomes stuck in particular emotions or ways of doing things that don’t help them or those around them, experiences very intense emotions that seem difficult to control or their behaviour suddenly seems much younger or changed.
For preschoolers this may appear as sleep difficulties, suddenly wetting their bed after being dry for some time, becoming clingy after being confident, or struggling to do age appropriate activities such as attend preschool, make first friends or play.
School age children may demonstrate some of the same behaviours as outlined for preschoolers as well suddenly behaving like a younger child, with baby talk, having tantrums or frequently becoming overwhelmed or withdrawn.
Teens may self-harm, be irritable all the time (not just grumpy), be very withdrawn and shut down (not just needing their own space) or seem constantly sad.
Adults may experience low motivation, low mood, difficulty in relationships, anger management difficulties or anxiety that prevents them from living the life they wish to.
The above is not an exhaustive list so it can be useful to be able to talk through your concerns to help you decide whether you need to seek the help of a therapist. For this reason I am available to have a brief chat about your concerns to help you decide whether you need to take things further. My phone number is 021 206 3478.
The aim of any intervention is to help people get on with living their lives as they wish. As a general rule getting in touch with a therapist early on can prevent ongoing struggles and turn things around more quickly. Rather than being a last resort it can provide support that prevents things getting worse. This is a very different way of looking at therapy from how it has been traditionally viewed but in my opinion is the most useful way of utilising therapy, not as an ambulance at the bottom of the cliff (though it can be used this way) but instead as a preventative of ongoing and worsening struggles.